What Would the World Be Like Without Alcohol?

So the other day I had a moment of deep thought..........aka really had to use the facilities.......and thought o myself, what would the world be like if we never discovered alcohol? The people in the days of the prohibition must have had a similar moment....and of course Al Capone had an entirely different one but hey that's another story for another day. Anywho, here are a list of things I thought about during my moment...what do you think?



1.) Would anyone have any real desire to go to college?

I mean really? Why did we all really want to go to school? We all saw Animal House and Van Wilder and were like fuuuuuuuuuck yea I want me some of that! No one is like aw man I can't wait to further my education and put myself in a position to succeed in life. Well except a certain few. We like to call them freaks. And there would have never been the most epic party in the history of Assumption College and no off duty RAs for anyone to go tell about it!!!!

2.) What would Jesus have had to drink at the Last Supper?

Yea I got all religious on you here. But I know I just blew your mind!! Like picture the whole crew of Apostles around the table and Jesus breaks out some Mountain Dew. I don't know about you but if Jesus tells me to do the dew then I must oblige! Evan Harry wouldn't say no to that.

3.) Perm......

Yea there's another mind blow for you. Without beer and shots this kid could at least be a millionaire if not billionaire by now. Fact not opinion.

4.) Just how much would the number of hookups decrease by?

Yup if this were to ever happen 95% of us would be screwed. Well I guess screwed isn't the appropriate word. On the flip side of this, I can only assume produce sales would skyrocket....use your imagination here.

5.) Would Captain Jack Sparrow be able to do this..............






But why is the rum gone!!!???